When people live close together conflicts can arise. Reports of domestic
violence on an almost daily basis might lead us to believe that violence in the
home has increased. In actual fact, it has always existed within families.
Thanks to institutions such as women's refuges and advice centres, the public is
now more aware of this issue. For example, violence is no longer an internal
family problem, instead it affects everyone. Those who engage in violence are
liable to prosecution. The police will intervene if called. Outsiders are,
therefore, also obliged to inform the police if they know about violence in
order to protect the victim and bring the perpetrators to justice.
Domestic
violence includes:
Emotional violence
Physical violence
Sexual violence
Economic violence
The following are punishable offences:
Beating
Locking up
Verbal abuse, threats, threats with weapons
Using weapons
Sexual harassment, rape
Domestic violence, however, begins even
earlier on with malicious acts:
After years of oppression, vilification and violence many people are
past defending themselves. They will have lost their self-confidence a long time
ago and may even believe that it is their fault that they are in that
situation.
There are, however, also obvious reasons why women
in particular remain in violent relationships: financial dependency,
responsibility to children or loss of residence permits. What these people need
is someone to show them understanding and support.
Nothing can justify
violence. Every individual deserves to be loved and respected. The law is
clearly on the side of victims in this regard. They should use the rights to
which they are entitled as a Swiss citizen and seek help.
Protection
against domestic violence:
Call the police immediately if you are being threatened.
Get a protection order issued by the civil court (overview of all courts at
www.gov.ch). The court allocates apartments,
awards custody of the children and determines the man's alimony obligation.
Find someone you can trust and whom you can call for help in an emergency.
Keep personal items such as your ID, bank details, residence permit etc. in
a safe place.
Devise an emergency plan and make arrangements with the children.
Carefully plan your departure beforehand.
Always have an emergency bag packed and arrange in advance where to go.
Violent people are often controlled by compulsions and try to suppress
negative emotions such as aggression, powerlessness and fear.
In doing so they usually blame their anger on the situation or
on others and refuse to take responsibility for their own deeds and actions.
There is no excuse for violence, especially not in the family. There is no shame
in having problems. However, help should be sought before it is too late.
What
you can do as the perpetrator:
Contact an advice centre for violent men.
Speak to people you are close to about your feelings and problems.
Learn how others handle pressurised situations and anger.
Think about how to react next time in a similar situation.
Step back at the first sign of stress and conflict.
Leave the house when you realise "it" has reached that point again.
Take a walk or talk to friends.
Seek help from a doctor, psychologist or advice centre.
Perhaps talk to a confidant at work about your problem with
violence.
Intervening in an internal family argument takes a lot of courage. Many
people are also afraid of getting caught up in the cycle of violence
themselves.
It is important to react early to protect the
victim. No one is expected to put themselves in physical danger and act
directly. Calling the police in good time may save lives!
What
to do as an outsider:
Call the police in an emergency.
Do not put yourself in danger.
Talk to the victim.
Show understanding and compassion.
Take what the victim says seriously.
Make it clear that it is not his or her personal problem, but rather a
widespread problem.
Refer him or her to the Swiss Victim Protection Law (Opferschutzgesetz).
Offer personal help and a possible refuge.
Be patient if the offer of help is not taken up immediately.
Gather information about help available and give it to the victim.
Stick to your own limits and do not consider yourself the problem solver.
Speak to the violent person about his or her behaviour without being
judgemental and refer to help available.
